You wake her, you take her!

We have a general rule in our house, regarding us, our 2 girls, and any other visitors - you wake her, you take her!! With Catriona, who just turned 1 this past Christmas Eve, this rule is strictly enforced, simply due to the fact that she does not sleep well. People have kindly given "advice" on how to get her to sleep better. While this advice is given with good intention and love, it is not beneficial - not because it is bad advice, but because we have already tried it! You name it, we've tried it. With Cambria, who just turned 3 a couple weeks ago, the process to get her to sleep during the night and at naptime, and go to sleep on her own, was not nearly so complicated. That's saying a lot, because she was our first baby, and everything is harder the first time, right? Wrong... At 5 months old (with the exception of growth spurts, teething episodes, or colds), Cambria was sleeping through the night, with regular naptimes during the day (sometimes in my lap), and by 7-8 months, was going to sleep in her crib - by herself. We didn't have to rock her to sleep or give her a bottle to fall asleep with in a lap at that point. We laid her down and she went to sleep. End of story. Catriona seems to be... hmmmm... how can I put this nicely... high maintenance. In the first few months, it's very easy to just let baby sleep with you or right next to you in the bassinet, which is what we did. At 5 months old, she had outgrown her bassinet and it was time to move her to the crib, which every mother dreads. Duhn-duhn-duhn!!! THE CRIB! Previous to moving her to the crib, she was still waking up several times during the night. Sometimes she wanted a bottle, sometimes she wanted to be held, sometimes she wanted to play... The list goes on and on. We hoped that moving her into her own bed in her own room would help all of us sleep better. So, with high hopes and thoughts of good sleep, we moved her. Little did we know what we were in for. From that time on, it was a constant changing of schedules every couple of weeks, trying new things, to try to get her to sleep better at night. We would try a new schedule for a week or two, and when it failed (which it always did), we tried something else. We tried changing her diet, her formula, the amount of formula we were giving her, the amount of solids we were giving her, we tried changing her naptime schedule, we tried different bedtime routines, we tried lotion, we tried massage, we tried letting her "cry it out," we tried laying her down on her back, on her side, on her tummy, facing one way in the crib, then another... Are you tired yet, because I sure am!! Just talking about it wears me out! Around the time that Catriona turned 11 months old (right around Thanksgiving and moving to our new house), we gave up. We haven't tried to change anything else. Her diet is normal, her naptimes are normal, the amount of formula (now milk) is normal - she just doesn't sleep well... When we stopped trying to change things, she was still waking up 3-5 times during the night, but was finally starting to go back to sleep on her own (after 20-30 minutes of fussing around, that is). That was an improvement, but still not very good - waking up that often in the middle of the night and staying awake for 30 minutes each time is miserable! Then of course, once you finally get back to sleep, she wakes up again. I can happily say, that over the last month (yes, after she turned 1), we have been able to sleep (mostly) through the night! She wakes up once or twice, but is typically back to sleep in 10-15 minutes! I have still been holding her during naptime and getting her to go to sleep in my arms at night, and then I lay her down... This sleeping process has been dragged out for so long, simply because she's not a good sleeper! I laid her down for her nap today, fully expecting Cambria not to get a nap, and Catriona to not get a nap because of the fussing. After 1/2 an hour of crying, screaming, fussing, and 3 trips in to lay her back down, she finally went to sleep - on her own, by herself, and slept for an hour and a half!!! VICTORY!! This may not seem like such a big deal to many mothers, but for this mother who has not had a decent night's sleep in... I don't even know, this is monumental! My "baby" who is actually a toddler at this point, is finally starting to sleep! After trying for so long, trying so many different things, and trying SO hard, I have realized that this has nothing to do with me - it just shows how very different children are! Just because one child sleeps doesn't mean that the next one will or just because one child has horrible acid reflux (Cambria) doesn't mean that the next one will (Catriona)! For a while, I felt like somehow, it was my fault, like I wasn't doing a good enough job. The pediatrician just kept reminding me, SOME KIDS JUST DON'T SLEEP WELL!!! SHE'LL GROW OUT OF IT EVENTUALLY!!! It's a lot easier to heed advice like that when you're not completely sleep-deprived! I now know, that of course, he was correct, and that at least for the time being, she has "grown out of it."
I hope that you all had a wonderful holiday season and that you are well!
Lots of love,
Carrie